a little rambling this morning...

You ever notice how we hate to wait? Waiting is so intense, it requires so much of ourselves on every level. I spoke with a friend last night who is waiting on the Lord, there are people pulling to the left and pulling to the right but she is standing firm and she is waiting. When someone comes to me and asks me what i think they should do in a particular situation I always say it is better to wait upon the Lord than to make a rush to judgment and get out of His Will. I have been out of His Will and I have to say that was the darkest time in my life. I scratched and clawed trying to get back to Him after what was one of the more foolish decisions I ever made, but I've learned a great lesson. He taught me through my stubbornness behavior and intent on having my way that it is better in HIS way and timing and now in my older and wiser age, I am much more cautious about obeying and staying within the borders that He has set for me.
The truth is that I have not been the same since that Saturday home from the hospital. Nothing has been the same as it was and I think it took that for the Lord to get through to me. Now I am even more determined to stay with Him. You know those "kiddie leashes" that parents have, you see them sometimes in the Mall, the child is wandering about and from their wrist is a string or leash. When the child gets too far away the parent just tugs on it and the child knows he or she has gone too far. I pray that sometimes the Lord will put me on a spiritual kiddie leash and tug at me when I get too far away from where He wants me to be. Lord I know that You will never leave me nor will You forsake me, You sent Your Son to die in my place... but the fear I have is that I will wander off and I pray that You will not let me leave You and never allow me to forsake You. This is my greatest prayer... "I will seek You in the morning and I will learn to walk in Your Way and step by step You'll lead me and I will follow You all of my days".